Friday, May 27, 2011

New Constructions : State of the Art; a survey.

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For those interested in Simple thinking and High living !

Announcing our new project in the vicinity of those that count.

Introducing a new way of living ! Those interested may click on the graphic below to see the details.



Announcing our latest Gated Community Township project, dedicated to the nation !

The Tihar Residences.

Situated in the Lap of Stature, we introduce the Tihar Residences, as a one-of-a-kind home, for those , for whom, Money is Time.

Well paved infrastructure, landscaped in a thoughtful way, with assorted hedges and thorny trees, designed to save the residents from pesky security.

All houses come with Gyms equipped with the latest machines. Bench presses that move you, Treadmills with stationary transparent floors, below which the belt moves (keeping you unmoved), a special sweat spray attachment, imported from Switzerland, which can be programmed to spray artificial sweat on your face every 30.67 seconds, keeping time with special music like ,"My name is Sheila !" etc .

This machine has been spirited away from the left overs of the CWG Games in New Delhi, while the Chairman of the Organizing Committee turned his head away during the taking of the Salute at the Opening ceremony.

Furniture is made of hollowed out wood, and the space inside is available for an extra price, depending on what you wish to hide inside. Walk in closets are provided, and the occupants are invited to test out the facility of actually being able to walk-through the closet from one room to another. Ideally designed for quick getaways.

Special drainage system, segregated into organic and inorganic trash. The inorganic trash is mostly paper based high value trash, and the graphic shows the results of our test, when we tested whether the stuff is able to flow out on to the road, , unaltered .

On special demand, from so many office bearers of sports bodies, who are competing for residences in the Tihar project, we offer all roads as jogging tracks. As per the higher court requirement , all joggers to wear RFID tags on their ankles. Earlier there was a requirement to wear these tags on shoes, but some shoes got miraculously interchanged outside the Laxmi temple, and some replaced these with some shoes thrown at them by some admirers outside Tihar.

Cleaning of drains specially carried out on request. The graphic shows the result of one such drain cleaning operation, when some stuff flowed out onto the jogging tracks.

Documents required for applications for allotment of Tihar Residences.:

1. Corruption level of a minimum of one thousand crores. CBI chargesheet notarized copy will be accepted.

2. Passport must show trips to England, Singapore, France, China, Switzerland.

3. Those who can show proof of a shoe thrown at them will get preference

4. Those being investigated by a special retired supreme court judge, will not have to show the Delhi domicile certificate.

5. The accommodation committee has decided to give special privileges, to those who appear in phone taps of a powerful lady called Radia (name rhymes with "yeh kya kiya ?").....

6. Lady applicants for residences will be allotted one extra room in their residences, for elder family members, should they decide to come and visit.

Usually reliable sources confirm, that 3 members already occupying these residences have been purchasing I-phones, recently available in Delhi. It is feared that with so many telecom types in Tihar's Gated mansions, there may soon be an announcement of the formation of a new telecom company called N-G Services, headquartered in Lutyens Market. An occupant of Tihar , with Royal connections, was heard saying, " What is 2-g, 3-G ? What is spectrum ? You name the Ji, I'll give you the numbers ....".


Rush your applications, with an initial deposit (non refundable, but transferable) of 100 crores only . Cheques accepted. Kindly make the cheques payable to "Tihar Bathroom Construction Fund".

Remember, the land has a clear title. There is no possibility of an investigation a la Adarsh.