Monsanto has declared India to be a most favoured destination. Ever since one of its big shots became Bush's appointee in the Food and Drug administration, The US decided to change its emphasis from CTBT to just BT.
Reports indicate that the company has contracted some folks in Delhi to write an alternative to the Bhagwad Gita. Particularly the chapter on "Fruits of your labour. "
The original urged the populace to work without any thought of the fruit of that work, and called that the best worship.
While the citizens remained loyal to that, the situation was intolerable to the Monsantos. They decided that the fruits needed to be made more attractive , so everyone would hanker after them, and to hell with labor. Certain members of the ruling combine were reported to be greatly impressed by the symmetry in the tomatoes, and shine in the corn, not to mention the new shape of the brinjal , which resembled an actress. They voted for a BT banana in the shape of a $ sign, but were ruled out by the communists.
Our sources indicate that efforts are on to produce a BT-Gita, authored by Mr G. Bush. Performances are on in various parts of India complete with a chariot, horses, peaccock feather in the hair and so on. Certain ministers are playing the role of Arjun on shift basis. Sometimes they forget they are acting , and suddenly come out with the truth, like "Milk price will rise", "Sugar price will dip for some time", and " Now that I have hoarded some much milk and sugar for the IPL cricketers, what will I do if Australians are banned ?"....... whereupon they rush to meet problem solvers and creators in Mumbai.
The Environment Minister was seen holding his head listening to the new BT -Gita which Mr Bush read from a lectern teleprompter. Looking at Mr Bush as Krishna gave him migraines. In the meanwhile the PM requested that mustard be left out of the "reserved list" for BT-fication.
Our bureau reports indicate that no one likes the taste of these BT fruits and vegetables, and it is suspected that certain politicians earlier hit by rotten tomatoes are now supporting BT as those tomatoes don't rot, and taste nicer when they splash on the face.
Rumor has it that BT-shoes will be next on the list. When someone throws a BT shoe at you, the shoe gets hurt.
While BT-Bush is reported to be pleased, various agitated active sporty legislators, participating in the Legislative furniture throwing BT- Games are protesting.
Say no to BT-fication. No BT. No Ceetee. Just Preity. Zinta ?